Film

THE GALAXY INVADER. 1985

Director: Don Dohler

Reviewed by Paghat the Ratgirl



The level of special FX in The Galaxy Invader are so cheaply retro that it seems like drive-in movie science fiction from the 1950s or very early 60s. But by gum it's from 1985.

Galaxy InvaderThe meteor FX in The Galaxy Invader are on the level of Saturday Morning cartoon limited animation. A strange meteor or UFO strikes the earth releasing a heavy-breather alien. The alien as portrayed by Glenn Barnes is a dude in a full body rubber suit with big wobbly feet & a skull-like head, by no means the dumbest alien possible; Killers from Space (1954) is more in the running for dumbest alien possible.

Mostly the patient fan of terrible movies has to listen to bad actors deliver worse dialog with scarsely any action. But a few things happen to perk up a viewer. A white trash hick who was chasing his own daughter through the woods with a shotgun when waddaya know, up pops an alien being.

The redneck shoots the alien without provocation & it runs away, leaving behind its glowy light-pulsing globe, which keeps passing back & forth between alien & rednecks without it ever being revealed what it's for

An even bigger hick who drools while puffing cigars comes to look at the globe which the smaller hick & his son had hidden in the garage. The boy pokes it with the stick to make it spew a bit of flame. The drooler agrees it's worth a lot of money. The wife wants to give it back to the alien but rednecks never listen to their wives.

The rubbersuit alien gets shot a couple more times, sometimes unhurt, elsetimes hurt, with no rhyme or reason to which. He defends himself with a firecracker sparkler gun, which the rednecks also get their hands on for a while, the alien being such a clutz with his only two belongings.

Numerous of the white trash 'round these parts get roaring drunk at the local moonshine waterin' hole. When sufficiently boozed up they get their rifles so they can go on an alien hunt, yeehaw.

They'd like to catch the alien alive to sell him or put him on display, but they're certainly not adverse to killing the guy outright. They also kill the doctor who thinks they shouldn't be out drunk & killing stuff, screw you doc, bang bang. The alien saves the life of the doctor's son from the murderous rednecks, just in case we hadn't yet noticed it's not a bad alien, then at long last shooting it works & it dies. If it has a space ship out in the woods somewhere, we never found out about it.

We learn from this film that rednecks are just natural bullies & knowing the alien might actually be a nice guy just encourages them to be meaner. Happily the worst of the rednecks get killed. Obviously this is simply an awful, awful movie. But I enjoyed it though, cuz I'm weird. It's most amazing component is the impossibility of figuring out if the director does or does not know how fabulously stupid it all is.

copyright by Paghat the Ratgirl



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