Post Impact
aka, IMPACT FINAL. 2004

Director: Christoph Schrews

Reviewed by Paghat the Ratgirl

A comet strikes the Earth involving so-so special FX, then the credits begin. The film's intent is to reveal what Earth will be like for the survivors post-impact, after an event similar to what ended the age of dinosaurs.

Post ImpactMuch of North America is rendered instantly unhabitable by the pre-credits event of Post Impact (2004). We're informed it will remain uninhabitable for thousands of years.

Captain Tom (Dean Cane) separated from his wife & child, who remain behind in Berlin as the new Ice Age descends, covering the northern hemisphere is glaciers faster than a speeding bullet.

An experimental microwave energy satellite &/or weapon had been put into orbit just before the catastrophe. It was believed to have been incapacitated by the meteor. But three years later it is clear someone in or near Berlin, at the heart of the unreachable icy wastes, has control of an activated microwave satellite & for no particular reason beyond jealousy or psychosis intends to bake the equatorial survivors of the ultra-catastrophe.

Captain Tom wanted to go to Berlin anyway to see if his family is making do in an igloo or what. Along with the daughter (Bettina Zimmermann) of the inventor of the microwave energy satellite, they set out on a quest to save the equatorial federation from becoming the next shampooed poodle in the microwave oven.

Turns out the same microwave satellite can be used to "kickstart" the world's weather. How lucky is that? The script resembles something concocted by a ten year old comic book fan. Poor good-lookin' Dean Cain. And to think, there was a time people thought he'd be a star someday.

copyright by Paghat the Ratgirl

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